How Ian and Sean started Bald Guy Greetings
We can’t imagine why you would care about this. But we kind of love that you do.
PHOTO: Ian Kalman at the National Stationery Show in 2008.
Just one day after someone died laughing in the Bald Guy Greetings booth.
They were absolved of all charges.
August 22nd, 2005: How It All Started
It all started when Ian wrote a message on a birthday cake for his good friend Craig. The message on the cake read, “35 years old! If this were the 1700’s, you’d be dead!” Much to Ian’s delight, everyone laughed.
Well, everyone except for Jack Woodworth, but Ian never really found Jack that funny, so he viewed the cake writing as a considerable hit. That evening, someone mentioned to Ian that the message he wrote would be a funny greeting card, and the first glimmer of what would one day be “Bald Guy Greetings” began to form.
Also, it should be noted that the cake cost $25 bucks, and no one ever offered to pay Ian back. (For those interested, it was a 1/2 sheet Baskin-Robbins ice cream cake made with mint chip ice cream and chocolate cake.)
October 10th, 2005: The Writing
On a flight to New York to celebrate the wedding of his friends Colin and Emily, Ian wrote and wrote and wrote. By the time he landed, he had written about 50 cards.
October 15th, 2005: Testing the Cards
It was time to show the world his cards for the first time.
And by the world, he meant 18 friends from his old Advertising Agency,
and the Chinese guy who worked next door.
Shoot. Is it racist that I pointed out that he was Chinese?
His name was Chuck, and he was the bartender at the bar next door to the Advertising Agency.
In hindsight, I should have just written, "...and Chuck who worked next door."
October 20th, 2006 – The Sweet 16
After a month of deliberation, 16 cards surfaced as the favorites. Although Ian's words on a blank page pretty good, he quickly realized these cards needed a design element. And Ian knew exactly where to turn.
Unfortunately, Ian’s first choice was not available, but he knew exactly where to turn second. He turned to his long-time friend and artist, Sean Farrell. And the partnership was formed.
And the rest is history.
Well, not history. What’s the word I’m looking for?
Wait, history was the right word, never mind.
November 9th, 2005 – The Origin of the Name
At a lunch with his buddy Steve, Ian explained that he needed a better name for his greeting cards.
At the time, they were called “Kalman’s Greetings," but Ian always knew that couldn't be the name.
Steve let out a laugh and said, “Why not call them Bald Guy Greetings?”
At first, Ian was upset, thinking that Steve was making fun of his complete lack of hair.
But after about 20 seconds, Ian decided he loved the name and was completely comfortable with his baldness.
December 15th, 2006 – Our 1st Sale
Rafi Kugler of San Francisco bought ten Christmas cards that Ian and Sean printed on a little HP printer.
And 10 Christmas cards is pretty good for Rafi, because he’s half-Jewish.
January 20th, 2006 – Going to The Show
Ian and Sean booked a booth for the National Stationery Show in New York. (May 21st – 24th, 2006)
The show was still five months away, but they had a lot to do to get ready.
Find a Digital Printer
Print Envelopes
Make Catalogs
Book Flights
Build a Website
Book a Place to Stay
and a million other things.
Well, not a million other things.
But there were at least 6 or 7 more things they had to do.
January 25th – Feb 8th, 2006
Ian went on vacation.
This has nothing to do with the history of Bald Guy Greetings,
but Ian had a great time and doesn’t want to forget it.
Also, check out those dates! That's two weeks, baby.
May 11th, 2006 – The Printing of the Cards
Can’t think of anything clever to write here.
They printed the cards, and then they picked them up on this date.
That’s really it.
To be honest, we can’t believe you’re still reading this.
Thank you for your interest in us.
May 21st – May 24th, 2006 – The Show
It would be here that they showed their cards to buyers, store owners, and greeting card reps, and see what the real world thought of their cards.
It was during this show that they actually realized there is definitely a need for funny greeting cards that were actually funny.
There were only a few greeting card companies that actually made funny cards.
And one card company that had some that were pretty great.
Needless to say, there is no way we’re gonna give them a shout-out on our website.
We spoke with them, and they were kind of jerks to us anyway.
UPDATE: They went out of business in 2022.
Sadly, a lot of card companies went out of business in 2022.
Okay, that concludes the History of Bald Guy Greetings up until their first official day. (May 21st, 2006)
Thank you for taking the time to read this.
Please tell everyone you know to check out baldguygreetings.com.