I can't tell you how excited I am to give you this congratulations card. I bought it about 3 years ago and you finally did something amazing.

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  I don't even have a reason to get you a card. I just got you one. I guess that makes me one of the most amazing people you know.

  $3.95

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  And I don't mean that in the overly used Jerry Maguire kind of way. I mean it from the bottom of my heart. My life truly would not be the same without you. But I do wish you were less controlling.

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  But don't get too comfortable with the situation, because sometimes love fades. So keep trying to impress me, okay?

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  I'm so happy you're pregnant. I thought you were just getting fat.

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